Anticipation

Frozen. Underneath these clouds
Downstairs in the living room,
I wonder
If there was a way I should’ve
Told you that I was coming
home.
And if, perhaps, that would have
Have somehow had comforted
You, but…
How incredibly selfish. That January day,
You hugged me as I went
Out the back door. And now,
To think that I
Could change the hand of God
To think that
Perhaps I could’ve stopped Him
From calling you to rest….is not fair.
Is not right
Because you are a God who
Knows best, you are a God
Who has her in your arms,
You are what cannot be…
comprehended, Your grace is
what guides me to
Memories of birthdays,
Her laughter
And the promise
That, because of You,
she passed
Beyond the shadow of death.